Thursday, January 18, 2007
I had a lovely evening last night- thank you for asking. I babysat my nephew and niece, ages 8 and 6. We have a very specific routine when I'm in charge. First we laugh at the fact that anyone has put me in charge, then we order Indian Food, Chicken Tikka Masala and an order of Nan. With our delightfully spicy meal we enjoy sparkling repartee. The main topic for discussion last night was how balled up rye bread looks like pooh, which is true. We discussed the practical jokes that could be performed with our new found knowledge.
We then pull out blank pieces of paper and the coloring pencils and begin a story. The stars of our stories are always the same with a few special-guest appearances. My cat Ponette is always in the story and is generally the star. Ponette is the lovable hero who has no morals or foresight. Past stories have included,
Ponette Steals Uncle Misplaced's Car and Goes For A Joy Ride
Ponette Steals Uncle Misplaced's Credit Cards To Score Catnip
Ponette Makes Unauthorized Long Distance Phone Calls.
Ever since Ponette hissed at the youngest for pulling her tail she's been typecast as being morally challenged.
The co-star of this on going nightmare is Pearl, which is their baby pug. Pearl is a cross between a pug, a poodle and a gerbil. Pearl is a gerpugle. The kids have decided that Pearl is the more sensible and ethical of the two animals. Our little 'do-gooder' generally says, "Ponette, don't do that!" or "Ponette, your driving too fast!" You get the picture- typical wet blanket. It's complete bullshit, of course, but what are you going to do- they're children.
The story last night began with Ponette and Pearl walking down the street when they come upon a bunch of beautiful colored helium balloons tied to a store front. Ponette, being the product of fetal alcohol syndrome and a thief, grabs the balloons. Pearl, predictable yells "Ponette don't do that!" Before Ponette can make a clean get away, she begins to float up. Pearl grabs her tail and they both float higher and higher. This is the start of their adventure.
It broke down at Chapter Two when it couldn't be decided if they land in a jungle or a forest. There was a lot of screaming and crying but after they calmed me down everything was fine.