Friday, January 11, 2008

Kelly will be in Oregon until next week. When the cats away the mice will what? Good question- let me lay it out for you. I fired up the electric razor and shaved my beard- but not all of it. That's right I left long sideburns, not quite muttonchops but long enough to show that I mean business and a goatee- I'm sportin' a new look for the new year. I'll be sliding on my boots and be steppin' high in tall cotton. It's a look that says- "Hey world here I am! If you can't handle my facial hair then you can't handle me- Sucka!" put it also says in a whiny small voice, "Please love me".

Here's the thing about guys with goatees and sideburns and now that I'm one of them I feel I can let you in on this secret, when they look in the mirror they don't see what you see. They could be 300 lbs, have more chins than a chinese phonebook, male pattern baldness and a lazy eye- they will still look in the mirror (with their good eye) at the long sideburns and goatee and think to themselves, "Damn, I kind of look like Johnny Depp" It's true, very sad but very true.

This new look will disappear before Kelly gets back- the only reminder will be the small hairs in the sink which i will inevitable miss.

Next Week: The Soul Patch

8 comments:

LDP said...

So true.

All guys grow a goatee at some point. It's inevitable. I've done it several times, and there's always that moment when I bump into someone who hasn't seen me in a while. I've just groomed the beard and I think I'm looking all cool and mysterious, and the other person's reaction is always something like, "Oh, you grew a goatee. Well . . . hmm. Is it itchy?"

Panic in New York said...

I saw a couple of guys like that today at the American Library in Paris, it was waaaaay creepy.

Anonymous said...

OK, #1 - delurking because Kelly is coming to Oregon and I'm already here. It's a connection, can you feel it?
#2 - Been reading your blog for about...5 or 6 months. Very impressed with your recent life choices and envious too. I enjoy reading about life in Paris from one who speaks like a "native".
#3 - most (not all) facial hair, not good.Not sexy, not.. well - fuckable. But if it helps you for now, go for it.
Brenda

Kelly said...

Please...no goatee, I know you are mad at me, but for the love of all that is holy, shave it off...please?!?!?!?!?!
xoxo
me

Kelly said...

BTW...I 100% agree with Brenda's comment!!!

La Belette Rouge said...

Misplaced,
As I just met you I hate to get in your face about the facial hair issue. However, I have to say that I am anti-facial hair. Even Johnny Depp doesn't look like Johnny Depp with all that itchy fuzz on his face. Ewww! My nose is itching just thinking about it.

And, it seems that your loved one prefers you without any follicular obfuscation. Perhaps, today as you take the electric razor to your your face you can repeat your earlier mantra, "Hey world here I am!"

p.s Thanks for visiting my blog. Happy you did--now I found yours;-)

Anonymous said...

Apparently what they say is true. You know how much I loved my beard. Now you know why I shaved it off. Having certain, um, activities withheld in protest gets old. And let me tell you, "Come on baby, we don't have to kiss," doesn't work.

Unknown said...

it's funny as i feel that while living in france it may be appropriate to call the next stage the 'soul patch', however my brother and i both agree that the more appropriately american version would be the 'flavor saver' (or flavor savor, get it get it???! lol). the goatee looks awesome.