In 1870, Yvan Salman, a journalist, was shot and killed by Pierre Bonaparte, great-nephew of Napoleon. Yvan, whose pen name was Victor Noir, was just 22 when he was killed. He was delivering the terms of a duel that was to occur between Bonaparte and the editor of Noir’s newspaper. Bonaparte angered that “minions” were delivering the terms slapped and then shot Victor Noir. It was all very manly, except the slap.

This would be just another forgotten, great moment in male history except for two factors
1. The monument, by Jules Dalou is excellent- it is a bronze statue of Victor Noir, dead in the street, his top hat laying where it fell, and his pants, for some reason, unbuttoned at the waist.
2. If you look closely at the shiny part of the statue you will notice that his… well….his …. Rather large… err…there is a protuberance ...ummm. As you can see his feet and hands are quite large -yes indeed they are. As are many parts of his anatomy.
It is said that if one part of his anatomy is …touched in almost a … rubbing manner the one rubbing will become pregnant very quickly. There has been quite a bit of rubbing going on these many years- quite vigorous indeed as you can see from the shine. This constant rubbing has begun to wear away Victor’s …. shiny part. A fence was erected to save the still ample …shine but was removed after scores of protests from impatient moms-to-be.

Hang on…I’ve got to chase Kelly from a grave.