Friday, December 19, 2008

With the threat of 2 inches of snow the city is abuzz. The grocery stores are crowded; there is a run on milk- we must hunker down for the impending doom. Everyone talks about the “winter warnings” The city is already saying they wont have enough salt for the roads to get through winter- it’s unclear how this is possible due to the fact that it has only snowed once so far and it snows each year.

Frogs might as well be falling from the sky to hear the local news programs. The weatherman finally gets his day- with all the catastrophes in the word he often feels left out. There are dark circles under his eyes because he’s been up all night “tracking the storm” Of course tracking the storm means he’s been looking at a satellite pictures in a comfy chair- I suspect it’s easier than tracking the one armed man but he looks more run down than Richard Kimble. He’s on edge- ready to smack the bubbly, blonde-headed news anchor right in her perversely white teeth but not so frazzled that he will mess with the sports guy.

All we can do is sit and wait for the 2 inches of cold death to appear over-night. We sleep uneasily. The roads are deserted.

When we awake there is no snow- nothing. “The city has been saved!” we cry. The “Great Storm of 2008” shifted north sometime time during the night- the weatherman tracked it. He looks relieved. I'm half expecting him to say, "I'm getting too old for this shit." We all take the day off just in case it sneaks back to get us. When did we become such wimps?

10 comments:

Kim Hambric said...

Oh, the drama of it all. What could be more exciting than watching the weather channel, hour after hour, then dashing out at the last minute into the jaws of death to get milk, toilet paper, and beer?

Anonymous said...

I blame that film the Day after the Day before tomorrow... or whatever it was called. Weatherman aren't happy with maps and pointy sticks anymore.

At least in France all the weather girls are like 45 but refuse to stop dressing like Britney Spears. That way, even when they are forecasting Staligradic permafrost, you get a real, nice warm feeling deep inside...

ps my word verification for this comment was 'schlep' - isnt that abusive Hebrew?

Starman said...

Another blogger has reported (with picture proof) that it has indeed snowed in Paris.

Oh, and there are stores in Paris that sell peanut butter (probably Monoprix).

BJ Lantz said...

Sounds like hurricane season here in Florida....

Starman said...

Have you been snowed in?

Anonymous said...

Why when we were kids we had to walk through a foot of snow to the bus and home - uphill both ways holding ice sickles in sandals.

And winters here in SF are just as bad if not worse...




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juliann said...

How happy I was to stumble upon your blog -- just spent the weekend reading from beginning to end. you have a wonderful, very specific "voice" funny thought provoking, interesting. My feeling for what it's worth, is that a book absolutely should be in your future.

Some pangs of remorse reading about your journey, as I too contemplated a move to paris a few years ago ... after selling my store, rented an apt. there for a month , ultimately it seemed too overwhelming or terrifying or complicated for single 50 year old woman. Maybe a mistake?

anyway, i've gone on too long. Love your blog and hope things work out one way or another.

juliann

Karyn said...

And my poor , beloved London got its ass kicked by the snow instead. Still, I'm glad Paris was, um, spared.

Seriously with the salt. It's frickin SALT.

Karen said...

Juliann, I consider that all the time -- but I haven't figured out how to do it. How does a person do that, make a move like that and find work if they're not a citizen? Would love to hear answers to this.

C├ęcile Qd9 said...

Still asleep... I'll came back